At work, our network is a constantly expanding web of interwoven relationships. This network grows more valuable over time and skillful negotiation becomes the key to success.
A successful negotiation is an honest and respectful conversation where both people win. Win-win negotiations clearly reflect our values and our firm refusal to make concessions that put our fundamental beliefs in jeopardy. When we stay true to ourselves, we prevent the dreaded flood of anger, frustration, disappointment, stress, and guilt.
In How to Say No and Still Get to Yes, William Ury presents the components of a successful negotiation:
How often do you find yourself in these situations?
Your boss asks you to work this weekend and you’ve got a family wedding two states away. Before you respond, stop and think. Analyze the situation – what’s most important to you and what’s important to them? What actually needs doing? Are there alternatives?
You are leading a complicated and high profile project. The marketing coordinator stops by your office and requests an immediate transfer to another project. You are surprised, maybe annoyed. Stop, think and then reply.
When a negotiation sneaks-up on you, be sure to acknowledge your emotions then make a choice not to act on them. Bringing anger to a negotiation is like throwing a bomb into the process. In his research, Keith Allard discovered that anger escalates conflicts, biases perceptions and makes impasses more likely. Feeling stressed? Use it to your advantage by recognizing your patterns, engaging with the stress and stepping back to unhook yourself and gain a new perspective. Or, you can try these on-the-spot stress reducers.
Say No and Still Get to Yes
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